Gularte was waiting at the beach unit when I arrived at the city parking lot, my Volkswagen’s engine knocking a bit, which had me worried, but not unduly so. The thing was still under warranty, although I had no replacement if it might be in the dealership shop for any lengthy period of time. I knew there was no way the cheap new dealership up along the Pacific Coast Highway in Capistrano Beach was going to give out loaners.
I let Gularte remain in the driver’s seat as I climbed with all my junk into the passenger side, sliding a canvas sack with my weaponized flare pistol hidden inside and the kid’s guitar case that held my sawed off Mossberg 500 pump shotgun, since the Bronco wasn’t equipped with one because it wasn’t actually a San Clemente Police-owned vehicle, even if the decals on both doors indicated that it was.
If your referring to Ross T. Dwyer in your story, That’s one mean ass looking Marine. Just from his picture on Wikipedia, it looks like him throwing you in the meat grinder didn’t cause him to lose any sleep that night!
Yes, Ross T Dwyer. That Dwyer. He was about as cold blooded as the snakes I ran into in the A Shau.
But, in retrospect, how was he to keep his humanity when he was sending a seemingly endless supply of
great young guys off to die. He had to know. Terrible price for him to pay in a different way.
Thanks for the comment and the support.
Semper fi,
Jim
James, Well you are here to write the story – so you did survive. It’s just we don’t know the outcome while the events are unfolding.
Thanks to Steve, Mark, and Gary and all who share their editing and movie fact checking skills.
Some minor editing suggestions follow:
Gularte was waiting at the beach unit when I arrived in the city parking lot
Context has him in the vehicle. Maybe substitute “in” for “at” and substitute “at” for “in” after “arrived”
Gularte was waiting in the beach unit when I arrived at the city parking lot
I’m having trouble visualizing whether or not the guitar case is or is not in the canvas sack.
If it is, then the sentence – “sliding a canvas sack with my weaponized flare pistol hidden inside and the kid’s guitar case that held my sawed off Mossberg 500 pump shotgun,” is fine.
If the guitar case is not in the sack then maybe substitute “plus” for “and” before “the kid’s”
“sliding a canvas sack with my weaponized flare pistol hidden inside plus the kid’s guitar case that held my sawed off Mossberg 500 pump shotgun,”
In Chapter 16 there is no mention of the guitar case.
I reached into my canvas bag and took out the sawed-off shotgun.
replacing the shotgun in my canvas sack.
double chain fence gates
Maybe chain link fence?
final protection for the path from the incursion of large nearly expended waves. The waves were small
Maybe add “Today” before “The waves
final protection for the path from the incursion of large nearly expended waves. Today the waves were small
their changes added a hundred pounds of torque and more horsepower than that to the engine not that all that power
How about substituting “plus” for “and” before “more”
Drop “than that”
Maybe add a dash between “engine” and “not”
their changes added a hundred pounds of torque plus more horsepower to the engine – not that all that power
my own being as bit on the rough and raw
Change “as” to “a”
my own being a bit on the rough and raw
entrance to his towers’ tiny covered area
Seems just one tower – so tower’s instead of towers’
entrance to his tower’s tiny covered area
There were no people on the state part of the beach and no guard in or around the tower.
We’re going from a general, usual situation to a specific. Maybe add “This time” or “Today” before “There”
This time there were no people on the state part of the beach and no guard in or around the tower.
the big rocks that protected the train tracks, and beachgoers from the passing trains.
Maybe add “both” before protected
Then add “from the waves” after “tracks”
Drop comma
the big rocks that both protected the train tracks from the waves and beachgoers from the passing trains.
door that led to the alley, connecting the compound
Comma seems extra
door that led to the alley connecting the compound
us on atop the table’s white surface.
“on” is extra
us atop the table’s white surface.
I’m assuming it is you who is saying:
“So, you’re saying that our sort of strange kinship, for want of a better word, should induce or motivate me to answer questions about all this that both of us are ordered not to do?”
what kind of firepower I already possess, is beyond me, as well?
Sentence is a statement rather than a question. Drop question mark.
what kind of firepower I already possess, is beyond me, as well.
The all so true statement: “Just like the Nam. The enemy is everyone, with the guys in black pajamas only the obvious ones.”
Followed by:
I was taken all the way back to General Dwyer in Da Nang, seemingly so long ago, blowing smoke rings while he ordered others to send me to my death.
Ouch!
Blessings & Be Well
Thank you again, my friend.
You are amazing!
Dammit man….life for you must have been quite an adventure…its guys like you kept everything in some kind of sane order when you were doin this stuff…in doin that sometimes you probably wrecked your own sanity doin it. I feel bad that it all went that way especially all the crap in that damn hell hole valley… God Bless You and all the men who were with you.
Popeye
Thanks Popeye. I saw Hamburger Hill, the movie last night. I think it was made in the early eighties. At least I saw part of it.
I was struck, of course, by how the A Shau they portrayed was mostly dry as a bone and the jungle growth almost non existent,
not to mention the lack of insects and wildlife. We didn’t wear utility clothing like that at all or helmets and so much more.
But the intent was pretty good although the ‘guys’ holding long talk about back home, and all that never ever happened, at least not
for me. It was all great training for what would come later, however, and also in understanding anthropoid life on this planet as it really is instead of how it so often portrayed. Thanks for the depth of your comment, as well as its entent.
Semper fi,
Jim
Jack Lemon and Peter Falk were in The Great Race with Tony Curtis and Natalie Wood. Kirk Douglass was not.
Yes, it was Jack Lemon. Thanks for the old person’s memory help!!!
Semper fi,
Jim
Oh man this is getting real sketchy, I’m probably as confused and nervous as you where at the time. Hoping this has a good ending for you! Great read keep going. Semper Fi Lt
I am here. That’s ‘ending’ enough when it comes to the turn out being considered…although I hope I am yet ‘quite a distance from the final ending!
Semper fi,
Jim
Good to have you back, LT
Good to be ‘back,’ so to speak. Life comes at us all.
Semper fi, and thanks for contact and caring.
Jim
More dammed if you do dammed if you don’t!!
Much of life is spent in spinning conundrums and this was a time of quite a few.
Thanks for the comment,
Semper fi,
Jim
The suspense grows !!
SEMPER Fi
Thanks Sgt Bob. It was a suspenseful time, but then my life has been that kind of life.
I am working to get Closer to God published as I have never exposed the public to my African adventures
in the CIA. The song by Toto came on called Africa and I was taken back.
Thanks for the comment and the compliment inherent in the writing.
Semper fi,
Jim
Every sentence begs to the next and every paragraph begs us to read on. Always captivating and building.
Not too many compliments as well written as this one. Thanks for putting it on here in front of my limited public.
Sempre fi,
Jim
I have used up all teh superaltives I know.. Just rest assured I will not miss a chapter whether or not I comment..
Thanks Charley, guys like you are all I have as the major publishing houses won’t take
work like mine to put in front of a much bigger audience. Just the way it is, but I do love
the straight from the heart comments I get from readers like you…and the time it gives me (not being famous)
to actually read, think about, and then respond to.
Semper fi,
Jim
Another gripping chapter LT, all I can say is thank you, and thank God you and other survived to tell the story! semper Fi
Thanks so much Joe. The next chapter, XVI, went up this morning as I continue…and the fueling motivation is comments
like your own. Very difficult to publish into a silent night…and today’s overwhelmed Internet is all of that that, a screaming
night that never shuts up or has much of merit to say…
Semper fi, your comment means something, as does so many others on here.
Jim
Hmm. These characters have left me wondering where their heads are, especially H.R. Haldeman.
Their heads were only on them. People like me, and even as high and credentialed as Bob Mardian, didn’t really
exist in those people’s minds or world except as barely intelligent creatures running around in their zoo…
Semper fi, and thanks for thinking about everything I’m laying down.
Jim
Nice job as always LT. There are two errors I found. The first is in the sentence with Tony Curtis should be “movie” and not “move”, and the second is in the paragraph in the ” I don’t know why, but there’s little question they aren’t worried that their antics will somehow go public. Those two men are quite possibly the most powerful humans on the planet right now and “it” should be “if”.
Thanks so much for the help Mark. My editorial staff!
Semper fi,
Jim
Great story. I’ve been following since somewhere in the middle of the A Shau Valley. Always eagerly awaiting the next chapter. Fellow Vietnam veteran. US Navy. 1967-70.
Great compliment Mike and helps keep me going. I am right in the thick of XVI right this minute.
Thanks for the continuing motivation.
Semper fi,
Jim
WOW!
One of those rare but really appreciated compliments. Thanks so much Sam.
Semper fi,
Jim
You got another hundred pounds of torque after the repairs to the Bronco. Not another hundred feet of torque,
DaNang 70-71
Damned straight…and I don’t know why I wrote it that way except they call it ‘foot pounds’ of torque.
I forgot the pounds which you so correctly added.
Thank you!
Semper fi,
Jim
You’ve come full circle!!! Not sure which situation is the most dangerous? At least you had enough experience by now to have all of your senses on full alert!
Thanks Gary, much appreciate the support, the reading nd the compliment.
Semper fi,
Jim
Always glad to be able to read another chapter. And anxiously wait the for the next.
Thanks Barry, half way through the next one. On a roll…
Appreciate the attaboy…
Semper fi,
Jim
“That’s right,” Gularte replied, the rapidity of his response catching me about to.”” Should “me” be “my”?
police garage said that their changes added as hundred” as should be a
I made no comment about Gularte’s driving, my own being as bit on the rough and raw” also change as to a
My wife’s instructions that I owed Gularte at least the information I had about what it was Haldeman and Ehrlichman knew or might likely know.” Not entirely clear sentence; understood in context but not clear.
I was THE least important character imaginable in the Western White House operation, ANd operation that was About as disorganized as it seemingly could be. Suggested edits all caps
More to follow as time permits
Thanks for the help Steve…don’t know what I’d do without you and DanC.
Semper fi,
Jim
Thanks for the kind words.
“The one’s who’d gone through” no apostrophe for ones
“pocket and placing between” placing it between
“more cash then I’d” than to contrast
“But I have question of my own.” A question
“There is that enough for you, sir?”” semicolon after there?
Riveting storytelling; can’t wait for the next chapter. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks for the great compliment and all the help Steve. You guys are all I have.
Semper fi,
Jim
The questions and the suspense builds.
Thanks a lot Rick for paying attention and for saying something here…
Semper fi,
Jim
awesome story
Thanks a lot Donald for the compliment and for writing it out here in public.
Semmper fi,
Jim