Arch Patton
DOWN IN THE VALLEY
Chapter 6
By J. Strauss
“Where we goin’ boss?” Matisse yelled from the drivers seat, as Arch got into the old battered convertible. Matisse accelerated away so fast the huge single door on the passenger side slammed with the sound of gunshot.
Some minor editing suggestions follow:
when he was about as dry as we was likely to get.
Substitute “he” for “we”
when he was about as dry as he was likely to get.
called jus that
“just” instead of “jus”
called just that
chopsticks half was to his mouth,
“way” instead of “was”
chopsticks half way to his mouth,
We might not beat whoever’s involved
“whomever” instead of “whoever”
We might not beat whomever’s involved
“And Virginia the bitch? Matisse asked, “what you going to do with her?
Need to add some quotes
“And Virginia the bitch?” Matisse asked, “what you going to do with her?”
passenger seat of the Pontiac Matisse, looked straight ahead and waited.
Period after “Pontiac” Drop comma after “Matisse
passenger seat of the Pontiac. Matisse looked straight ahead and waited.
Blessings & Be Well DanC