I was wrong and I knew it by the time the company had proceeded less than an hour into its rain-flushed mud-slogging move into an impossibly dark night of trying to break through abusive jungle bracken while attempting to be careful not to set off any booby-traps. The move was not going to be a night move because there wasn’t going to be enough hours left in the night to make it. I moved with the company in slow syncopated motion, surging ahead and together, one Marine after another, in each other’s footsteps, while stopping frequently because the men in front stopped. There were no reasons given for stopping because nobody talked during the move, but it was apparent that getting to the abandoned landing zone was going to take a whole lot longer than I’d predicted, and that meant we’d lose the cover of darkness at some point before we made it.
The rain drowned out everything when it came to sound, and whatever very limited visibility that had been available up on the side of the hill was completely lost inside our jungle, paralleling the river. I moved into a near trance, and then stopped patiently and frequently to await advancing a few more yards. Running to daylight wasn’t going to have any running, or even moving quickly, as part of the plan I realized, and that obvious fact meant trouble. The enemy would be figuring out what we were up to, and then moving to parallel us across the river. The smaller force we’d hit earlier, now behind us, would serve as the ‘stopper’ in our metaphorical rear end, slowly moving with us but staying far enough back to prevent us from retreating, or evacuating, or whatever we might try in that direction.
Since it had become unlikely that the company would reach the objective before daylight there was, however, at least some hope of air support coming in to complement what Cunningham could offer in the way of fire support. Firebase Cunningham was off at a western angle from the northerly direction we were following up the valley. If we needed fire, along the length of almost our entire exposure, we’d be right near the gun target line, if not on it. Range was the most inaccurate measurement in artillery, so I would have to be fully aware of exactly where we were at all times, and that might prove difficult with a company on line in near single file stretched out and winding its way through a jumbled jungle for the entire distance.
Thirty days has September April, June and November. All the rest have 31 Except February, it’s a different one It has 28 days clear, and 29 each leap year.
Well….yes, you indeed have the order and count properly down….
Semper fi,
Jim
Jim, these 2 are tiny tiny nits. I read it twice. Dave.
Running to daylight wasn’t going to have any running, => capitalize Daylight as part of the plan name?
“Casey, Pilson and a squad headed west to the river,” Stevens said, => perhaps add the oxford comma after Pilson
Thanks Dave, for the help with editing.
and for the support of putting the corrections up on here, as well…
Semper fi,
Jim
Thanks for this writing.
It has gripped my heart, I’ve cried more than enough, and somehow the words are helping me build the house my soul has desired for so long.
I think you know something more.
Thanks again, so much,
Karl
Yes, I do know something more, as you put it.
This ‘fictional’ work is going to get me in enough trouble already Karl.
The real secrets of what goes out in the field of combat are not discussable.
It’s like talking about UFOs. You can only really do it with other people who’ve had the experience.
And so we continue.
Thank you for both the compliment and the courage to write on here about you and that damned war.
Semper fi, brother,
Jim
At the FDC (Fire Direction Center) in that Artillery Battery, there where Kid marines doing that math for the fire mission.I think the Sargent was 19 years old and the rest of us were 17 and 18. Our LT was always back at Monkey Mountain as he didn’t like the the bush. we were on our own as far as supporting the Marines in the field. No adult supervision but we got the job done and we had plenty of WP and firecracker rounds. Always Faithful
Those giant wooden slide rules were something at Fort Sill. I never saw or worked inside a real FDC or a battery, for that matter.
Thanks to all those kids the accuracy and availability of supporting fires in the Nam was so dependable it was unbelievable.
I got so used to it that I stopped considering I might not get fire. Thanks Cpl for your work. Unsung heroes one and all…
Semper fi,
Jim
Jim, Did you have a backup, such as Fusner, to work with Cunningham in case you were incapacitated?
No backup Pete. Field training a forward observe on the fly in combat
is not part of the game when he’s sixteen and everyone’s lives are on the line
when he’s about to call in that kind of hell. Good forward observers are a whole lot more
rare that I would ever have guessed prior to performing that function under pressure in combat.
Semper fi,
Jim
Since Stevens left without your knowledge It would seem Stevens knew something was going up up front and you had not been included in the detail. Once he had confirmed his suspensions he should have gone to the first platoon “Jurgens might not let him” and radioed back or one of the other platoon RTO’s. It would have been quicker than running the full length of the company. With the river raging and shifting east how in the hell did the squad get to the west side of the river? Also that’s where Charlie is waiting for the kill. After all the raging river is your best friend for now.
The river shifted to the west, as the bank there was eaten away in the curve. Directions can get screwed up in my
head though and going back to fix it takes more time right now than I have. I will get to it to make sure my
statement of directions is true. Also, the second book will have a map of the A Shau. The first book occurred mostly
before we went down into the valley.
Thank you!
Semper fi,
Jim
Thanks for clearing that up Jim. Keep stomping we all love the story.
thanks JT I am all over it putting up another segment this night…
Semper fi,
Jim
Comment re a comment: I bet that the river changed course not because of flooding banks but because of avulsion. Fast floodwater on the outside curve erodes the bank. Slow floodwater on the inside curve deposits sand, as a curve bar. Snake-shape rivers change course all the time when the water runs high. Noticed that on the rivers of Georgia, then Quang Tri.
You are absolutely correct Fred. I did not know of the word ‘avulsion’ before but you are correct. It was exactly
that way. The water ate the bank away in the outside of the curve. Thanks for the help and analysis…
Semper fi,
Jim
The comments here have become as interesting and important as your story. As I read the comments about the disgraceful reception that you and your fellow Nam vets received upon your return I was reminded of my own reception and that of my fellow Seabees upon our return from Desert Storm.We and other service members were honored at a public celebration featuring the usual politicians and entertainers. As we entered the large auditorium I noticed a Vet in a wheelchair near the door who welcomed us with a smile. There were a number of Nam vets there in that crowd and all I could think about was the grace and generosity of spirit that they displayed in honoring us. Those men and women deserved that welcome home which they did not get. As you well know, DS was a conventional war in every respect, the culmination of all of our training to counter the Soviet threat. It pales in comparison to the war in Nam and the shit that you endured. All I can say is that you and the rest of the Nam vets have my utmost respect. Can’t wait to buy your books and continue reading your story and the comments posted here.
The Viet Vets, by absorbing a huge body of negative emotion on the part of the country’s population,
paved the way for other veterans coming back having a better time of it.
Thanks for what you’ve done and thanks for liking the story and commenting here. You have made yourself a
part of all what this is…if we can just figure it out…
Semper fi,
Jim
Im Still here reading and still enjoying and healing in my slow way, I put what happened in country to sleep mostly but not always for 40 years. Then got Bladder cancer 11 years ago at 57, and that makes a man reflect back on all things done in a lifetime, mostly things we wish we could have done better and changed. but that would change the coarse of our life’s. So because of that I live with and accept what had to be done good or bad. I am mostly happy I am where I am, and try to help and do good for others. this is my way I guess of trying to ask forgiveness. Because I to wonder if someone died because of something I did or did not do. Dam I wish that war would have never been. I just can not see any good that came out of it. But I love my my wife of 45 years, children, grand kids and I made it this far and without what I done they would not be. Sorry for rambling on. Jim if you do not want to post this I understand I’m just perplexed at what you and your company had to endure. My experience was not nearly that bad. Or you can edit out or thou it away.
Now why would I not post this interesting soul-searching odyssey? I had to reread it a few times to really get it.
Reflection. Self-analysis. Contemplation. Consideration. All things you are constantly involved with and all things
that really are the province of people who’ve been around on the planet for awhile and have been involved with real shit.
Combat is one of those things, but not the only means of coming up against harsh reality and having to deal with it…before
returning back into the cultural wombs all of us seek to build inside the perimeter of our tribes. You have, obviously from your writing,
one of those tribes and I compliment you on that. Solace. Acceptance. Participation. Meaning. Again these things that come with a bit
of age and life experience. Thanks your for caring what happened to me and the members of my company. It says as much about you as it does, or did, us.
Thanks your for the great depth and your willingness to lay it all out on here.
Semper fi,
Jim
You make decisions with available information. Then you find out later information that would have lead you to make a different decision. LT’s who have been in heavy combat never make general because they have made decisions that were later deemed wrong. Only politicians make general because they never make decisions that could ever be wrong.
It’s how we elect people too. They have to have a spotless record, which means they
never did anything at all in life. So, in being spotless, they come to a leadership position
clueless. We get one FNG after another. You are most correct
and thanks for that analysis and comment here on this site.
Semper fi,
Jim
We survived the reality but its the what ifs that drive us crazy.
Yes, we did survive that reality. It is also that others did not and have no clue.
They won’t believe because the reality is too harsh and too guilt-inducing for them.
And that is what is the toughest part. Thanks for this short but penetrating comment.
Semper fi,
Jim
Jim, boy you are drawing a bunch into this!! Starting to take longer to read the comments than the script!! But keep it coming you are a great writer! I feel as I am there with you. Glad to read in your replies that it is
HELPING YOU as much as it seems to HELP a lot of your readers.
Thanks Harold. I try. I mean in the replies. I don’t really try that hard int he story
other than to get the time and stuff that happened organized and then connected together as best I can.
thanks for writing and the reading in the first place..
Semper fi,
Jim
Jim, this is not my first letter to you. I know it will not be my last. I don’t know how you keep it organized in your head. Working as a private contractor, mostly in recovery, I spent five years and eight months in the Sand box and it all runs together for me. The Nam is a cluster of fragmented memories. I sometimes find myself wondering what happened when? In 1964 it was a very different situation. We were alone in our world. HC 34s were our transport. If you saw a Huey it had brass in it.
I have spent some time on your comment that you, mostly worked on forgiving yourself. I have, mostly, done that but still, the tears won’t stop.
I look forward with anticipation to each new posting. There are fewer and fewer of us every day and no one but us remembers the smell of the jungle. If you will check out my face book and look at the photos Note the hole in that T 72 over my right shoulder. That one was up close and personal and I find myself remembering it in different ways.Keep it coming Brother.
I have trouble with the organization in my head thing. This particular segment I am just finishing, the arrival at the old destroyed
landing zone, is particularly hard because of that problem. I woke up this morning and realized I had something backwards in development
and changing that changed the whole damned thing. So I am rewriting just now.
Thanks for pointing out the difficulty.
Semper fi
Jim
Does one ever really sleep in those situations? You might close your eyes but the other senses never stop their vigilance. Keep them coming I’m addicted now and hanging onto every word. When available I will purchase for re-read and to share.
Blessings, AL
Tomorrow afternoon is final final edit of the first book. I will not let it go to print
without one last edit by me. And I have to work to make it appear exactly as it was coming from
a major publisher. The type and font and spacing and dialogue and entry have to all be correct or
my effort will fall on fallow ground. At least the way I see it. But man, what a job! You don’t sleep
as we know it back here. You sleep like a cat….on and off and on and off with one eye cracked open.
Back here sleep changes too…with the alert phenomenon always there and instant wakefulness right available.
Thanks for the comment and I am working away…
Semper fi,
Jim
Took me 30 years to finally sleep a full night, Still have not achieved a full week of nights with out waking up to check the perimeter security, guard mount, and vibes …… Hot humid rainy nights are the worst….
Semper fi….This We Defend! Bob