The smell of blood would not leave me. A coppery tasting mess of cloying sweet aroma that was invisible, yet overwhelmed every other sense. The sound of Stevens’ body being wrapped inside a slippery wet poncho to be left, like that of the others, along both sides of the killing Bong Song. The river hadn’t killed any of them but its presence, like Charon, the ferryman of Hades, guiding his boat across the death river Styx, was always there, in the middle of life, but holding out constant and ever-changing invitations to go over to the other side. I tried to huddle against the relative cold comfort of the mud but there was nowhere to hide or go. I was the company commander who wasn’t a company commander. I was the one to be followed but not to be allowed to know I was being followed.
The darkness approached. I had to prepare myself and what was left of my team. There was no way to avoid taking the point. Usually, the exposure of being in that lead position went to some expendable new guy, but the entire plan depended upon surprise, and that meant not giving away our arrival. The amount of cautionary sensitivity required wasn’t something I could trust anyone to apply or really understand. The Starlight scope was going to be our oddest but most useful tool once again. I pulled myself from my muddy protective cocoon, knowing full well that our exposure to any fire from across the river might end the same way as Stevens had encountered. One single small arms round, or even a displaced rock, and it was over. Medivac wasn’t in the cards until we were back upriver near, or at, the concrete pad where the old airport still lay abandoned.
I’ve heard it said the mark of a good story teller is one that can pull his audience into the story with him, well Sir you did that with this last episode. I’ve read every episode to date, enjoyed them all, however The Sixteenth Night Second Part had this old Army infantryman fighting the firefight right there with you, Gunny, Nguyen, Zippo, Fusner, Sugar Daddy, Jurgens and the rest of the Marines there that morning. I could hear all the sounds vividly, taste all the taste, smell all the smells as I’ve lived them before myself. My throat was dry, sweat was beading up on my forehead an running down my neck, my heart rate was elevated and my breathing was fast and laboured as I read this episode. To say this episode is good would be an understatement, I’ve never read anything in my life that pulled me into it like this did. The best I can do is say thank you and continue on Sir.
Thanks a ton for this grand compliment at this particular time.
I will have a segment done by tonight because of this comment. Sometimes the segments come
slow but you are spurred me every onward. Thank you Bob.
No shit.
Semper fi,
Jim
Yeah thanks Bob, thought I would meet my maker before the next segment got finished. At this rate I will never get to see the end of the story.
Hell, J, the story is helping keep you alive! At least that is my subliminal intent.
I don’t have that many true blue real deal players in my life like you…and just where am I supposed to
go to replace you when you give it all up? Selfish? Yes.
But true and valid.
Shit.
Semper fi,
Jim
Sorry to take so long Jim…”bee in a beer can’….You are learning..minute by minute..the hardest way possible…no grizzled mentor to ask questions of..not even another ‘ boot brown bar’ with two weeks more time in the bush than you…would have been a welcome blessing….but ‘you’ve come far Pilgrm”…and now for the very first time, without realizing it.. you have said the words….””My Marines”….and, within a few seconds the Gunny whispers “You’re the Company Commander, so act like it”….What’s happening?? You don’t have time to smile, or even grin inwardly…no chance to consider that you might even have a chance of surviving afterall…..but you do realize one very important thing….”I wasn’t afraid..for the first time I could recall…”…and that was huge…. utter chaos that wasn’t chaos…MY Marines, moving forward, under control, fire and movement like a well oiled machine……the smell of cordite, fear, blood, and most importantly….victory….. Kilo lost some good men….but in a few moments you are going to see the greatest sight your young eyes have ever see up to this point…..the looks in the eyes of those men that didn’t die on that slope….those that would have, had you not walked into that valley…the looks in those eyes will be with you as long as you live…nothing will ever be so glorious as the quiet “Thanks” you read in them….Semper Fi Lt..
Goldsmith is back. And intensely Goldberg, I might add.
Yes, things were changing as we went although it was hard to
really see from the inside out, as ofttimes that is.
Thanks for the usual intense analysis and also some of the
reactions from the time I’m not sure really occurred but are certainly
great to think back about…
Semper fi, my friend,
Jim
We never let an expendable new guy walk point..I myself was not allowed to walk point for the first three months of my tour…and we were in it deep … if a new guy had been walking point when I spotted a trip wire fastened to a 1,000 lb duded bomb,,, the whole company would have been KIA.. I walked point til the last month of my tour..then turned it over to a grunt that had four months in the bush…we thought the new guys.. those that listened made it a lot farther than those who thought they knew it all…but even some of those who were bush wise didn’t make it eather…I quite often have back flashes of things that happend way to close..and wonder how I made it…your writing does keep me comming back for more..brings back some memories.. not all bad..we were brothers.. the second, first LT we had was a man that did care for his platoon..and there wasn’t a man amongst us that wouldn’t have volenteard to point the way threw hell for him…one out of three wasn’t bad.
I admire you and your unit Bill.
We all had our wars over there and when I began writing what happened to me and my story
I never thought others would chime in with how closely it resembled their own experiences,
here and there, but not everywhere.
We never found a thousand pound booby trap but then we were in the valley
and they never dropped thousand pounders there. Our
casualties in booby traps almost all came from booby trapped grenades and punji pits.
Small stuff compared to what you ran into.
Nobody wanted to walk point in the valley. Me neither.
It was a precarious position at all times and they didn’t always wait
to shoot at the guys behind you either, as I presumed from training.
But I sure respect what other guys went through and your way’s handling point
in your war sounds a lot more rational than my or our own…
Semper fi, and thanks for telling it the way it happened to you…
Jim
I read your story and re-read it then I read the comments and your replies. I cannot tell you honestly which is most revealing and important to me. I can say though that I identify with all of it.
ESSAYONS
Glenn
Thanks Glenn. I haven’t been writing for any effect but there certainly has been some. The support of guys
like you was both unexpected and so very supporting in continuing on. Harder than most people might think but I’m not complaining.
Much. Thanks for the help and for giving it to me right here in front of the whole world.
Semper fi,
Jim
Many have commented they see a movie script in your writing. To me each chapter seems like an ephisode of a television series. A very long, very compelling series.
That’s a wonderful things to say Bob. Band of Brothers was a phenomenal success but then
WWII has always been a popular war whereas the Nam has remained not quite at the top of the list, so to speak.
But I much appreciate the analysis and your conclusion…and your writing it on here for everyone to see…
Semper fi,
Jim
I agree this would be on of the greatest series of all time. What’s Tom Hanks number the book should be sent to him
Movie stars don’t really pick what pictures they work on, I don’t think anyway. But thanks for that thought.
Tom is supposed to be a great guy but I’ve never met him.
Semper fi, and thanks for the compliment and your writing it on here…
Jim
There were 121 comments listed when I finished this segment again. If you’ll let me I’d like to comment on that. What you do here is one of the most gripping things I’ve ever been exposed to. Your open, honest care for the other combat vets AND those of us who lucked up on boring, clap is the only problem assignments is impressive. The combat vets, through their comments, fill out your story for the rest of us. From “ten feet tall and bulletproof” to scared shitless and back speaks to the heart all of you showed to just function in the shit. And it’s not just one or two making the statement. Thank you all for what you did and for talking about it, I’m learning from you. Korea 66-68.
Thanks Walt, once again for saying something I did not think to say.
Yes, the comments here could be a book all by themselves is
one was given a reference.
My book ends up being the reference. It was never intended that way.
I answer all the comments made on here, which you know.
I can’t help but answer them because the comments are so germane and so genuinely heartfelt.
Thanks for doing what you do so well Walt, and that’s talk a talk you understand right down
to the soles o your feet and bottom of your soul…
Semper fi,
Jim
As I have read and re-read this segment several times since you posted it one song keeps playing through my mind. AC/DC Hells Bells (even though it didn’t come out until, if I recall correctly 1980). Your written words so skillfully bring us into the reality of your experience in a way I have not the ability to express. The intro to this song brings a sense of you and your men slipping as silently through the bush to your objective and in my mind relates to the explosive outcome of the determination you Marines had to win that battle.
Nuff said other than thanks once again for not Suger coating the truth of what it really was. Oh yeah. Take care of Bentley!
Thanks Jack. You are most complimentary. The work itself does not seem so to me, as I write away
putting stuff down as best as I can assemble it. Your words spur me on and I thank you for that.
No sugar coating and no minimization of the losses, physical and mental…
Semper fi,
Jim
Thank you for the heart you have just revealed to ssgt BobG. If this is his first trip in, our prayer should be that when he takes that scary ride home he is blessed to have a friend who has been to the city and seen that elephant. I had one and I have tried to be the listener when the friend has those questions he would never ask a medic for a long time now.
Now, the opening of this installment is the fodder of a wise literature professor will use someday to require his students analyze. I have never read a more important opening to a night and day which changed so many men. You are continuing to bless us all. Thanks again LT. Poppa
Well Poppa, I read what you write with intensity, quite naturally. You write deeply and you write about
what I write. I always sit back and think for a bit, which is uncommon for me when I read something.
Thanks for the depth of that compliment. When I write I am totally unaware that I might be writing for those that come next.
I just write it, edit it once and then paste it up. Again and again.
You are a true scholastic genius.
Semper fi,
Jim
My scholarship is the result of a Navy Chief father and in particular two English teachers, one high school, and one Jr College. They both demanded excellence and I got some practice writing performance evaluations until the AF let me retire. But critical thinking I believe was received genetically and even an AF Chief has to do some once in awhile. Thank you for the generous compliments. Poppa
My compliments about you and your own writing are spot on Poppa.
Thanks for always being there and here…
Semper fi,
Jim
If we ever get past political correctness in this nation, your work should be of great help not only to the military, but also to the field of psychology. That appears to be one area of the medical scientific field, that has been severely neglected by the military.
Your story is a minefield in psychology and should be thoroughly studied by all military leaders.
I’m not sure J. I mean I write the story but I can’t look at it the same way
with the kind of objectivity you possess.
I would say thanks but I’m not sure that is an accurate answer to what you are proposing…
which will never happen.
They don’t want to know.
Leadership of the country is not in the hands of men who’ve fought or would fight if called upon.
That’s just the way it is and they sure as hell don’t want to hear from people like me.
I am thrown away and I was thrown away
for some damned good reasons to them.
Semper fi,
Jim
My wifes uncle said that he thanks his father for teaching how to hunt and that is how he made it through Vietnam. He doesn’t talk about it very much at all but he did tell me about when he was walking point and he looked to his left and there was a north Vietnamese soldier there. He hit the deck, he said all hell broke loose , gun fire and rockets going of. He told me out of 48 of them only 8 were not killed or wounded. I tell you this because that was his greatest regret and he still after all these years has not forgiven himself. I’ve been kicking around the idea of sending him your book but I don’t want to bring him more pain but I would if that is what you and some of your readers think it might be right. I apologize for laying this at your feet but not having experience what you men did I would appreciate some guidance.
The book is about combat and what it does to us who perform in that
special limited and little known environment.
The book is not about what we do to effect the conditions present
in that nightmare arena, it is about what that arena does to us…
and then how we respond….
and regret is laced into everything that I write into and about it.
There is no Rambo crap in it and there were and remain so many situations
I could have performed so much better and
saved so many more.
The book will not hurt him. He’s already hurt to the core.
The book will just let him know it wasn’t him and that
there are a whole shitload of others walking around in his shoes
and sitting in his unrestful easy chair.
Semper fi,
Jim
Thank you I’m going to order the first book for him. I only hope he doesn’t take offense.
Thanks Frank!!!!
Semper fi,
Jim
“The book” I feel has helped me in some ways with the same understanding of what went on one night with me. We were a 12 man ambush that was moving and ended up in the wrong place, a small NVA camp. There were 2 of us KIA and 4 WIA in less then a minute. We all wonder why them and not me, I was wounded that night, June 2 1970. I hope this helps you some way.
Jim this segment was one of the best to date, but hard for me to read, to much in my head sometimes. Keep them coming.
Thanks Mike for this hard written comment.
Yes, shit could just pop up out of that jungle.
The best laid plans…
And then guys were gone or dying in your arms or right nearby.
And then there we were again, to do it all over.
Until it came to be our time. Thanks for the reading under difficult circumstance
and thanks for writing about it on here.
I hope the book helps and I hope being right here with the rest of us helps too…
Semper fi,
Jim
“The smell of blood would not leave me. A coppery tasting mess of cloying sweet aroma that was invisible, yet overwhelmed every other sense.” Well put, I know this smell, could not have found the words to describe it. Once again thank you so much for allowing me to better understand those who came before me, and to better understand myself. Please keep up the good work!!
Andrew Luder (SSG) (RET.)
Operation Iraqi Freedom 2003-2004
122nd Combat Engineers, 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment.
Thanks Andrew. Real combat reaches out across the years and generations, with those not being so exposed not knowing or understanding what it’s really like
and how the experiences and what you witness stays with you like your skin stays with you. Older, more cracked and irritated in places, but there it is.
Thanks for adding your comment, coming from a newer generation of warriors. Semper fi,
Jim
I was wondering what was taking you so long to write this chapter but then read the first three sentences and It sent a chill down my spine. I can’t imagine what it does to you.I have no words other than to thank you for your service then and the service you are still providing now.
G.W.
It seems the writing gets harder and not easier like I thought it would.
But I had forgotten about the toll that losing people takes on us and how all that is still down there.
Mostly, I am able to accommodate or block it aside now that I can’t use drugs or alcohol anymore.
I have to use activity and my close associations, none of whom are vets, by the way.
Thanks for your comment and the compliment written inside it…
Semper fi,
Jim
Outstanding again.
Semipir fidelis
Dave Coup
3/7/1 1969
Thanks Dave. Short comment and compliment, but meaningful.
Semper fi,
Jim
It was somewhat satisfying for a plan to come together and to be able to put some real heat on the little man. Wondering if we had done something different there would be less men lying at the bottom of that cliff. Knowing there would be many more if you had not came with a plan. Wanting to feel pride for what we did. Knowing full well that all we did was survive for another hour. Hope that tomorrow is not the day that I go home in that dark bag.
The fear of that bag was never far away and those bags were all over the A Shau
everywhere. Either stretched out and waiting, filled or long overdue for removal and swollen.
Tough times in that valley of no return…
Semper fi,
Jim
I am curious to know if your wife ever saw through your letters and knew/suspected what was really going on.
Here’s the letter written on the sixteenth, a bit of it I just dug through and found:
“I have all my writing materials right here but it’s raining outside. I’m quite comfy
under my poncho here. Kinda like Hawaii with the windy misty rain stuff coming down
all the time. I’m writing next to the Song River that I can hear in the distance because
it’s in flood. It’s not as hard today as it was yesterday but I think I said that yesterday.
I hope everything is going okay there and maybe in a few days I’ll get something from you.
I have to go because the Gunny says there’s going to be some kind of personnel trouble
further down the valley. The valley’s a lot like that valley we saw in Arizona on the way
to Fort Sill but a whole lot wetter and filled with green shrubs and flowers.”
Jim,
Have set back and devoured the last couple of chapters without making a comment. It is still my firm opinion that anybody that served in country deserves a condo in the French countryside. Thank YOU for reliving those scenes that I’m sure you’ve got etched on your brain like acid etching on steel!
Thanks James. A condo in the French Countryside. Now that’s interesting, given that the French fought in Vietnam before we went at it.
I know that association was not part of your meaning though and thank you for considering such an award. Instead I got no real job, a bunch
of rear area Marines who didn’t care for me, a limp, an eviction notice on my apartment and my car being repossessed. However, my apartment owner relented
and Sears saved my car for me…so the society came through when the system failed. Allstate fired me when the money for the special disabled program
ran out but the Nixon estate and the San Clement P.D. took me on. The French condo….I am smiling…
Semper fi,
Jim
Good installment James, though as a pointman I have to add that not ALL points were assigned…some of us CHOSE the duty. I can’t speak for others, but I was arrogant enough to believe that I could do a better job than others and would rather depend on my own skills and training, than on someone else’s. We lost men, and I was hit on 4 Dec 68 so I found out I wasn’t 10 feet tall and bulletproof. One of the few things I take comfort in from my tour, was that I never walked us into an ambush, and I never lost any of my brothers due to incompetency or forking up…it’s not much, but I’m grateful that I don’t have to fight THOSE demons at night. T “Angry Skipper” D Co. 2/8th 1st Air Cav Alimni Class of ’68 🙂
You are absolutely correct about that Tom. There were Marines and there were situations where the point
called for special treatment and handling of the position, especially when small patrol units went out.
Thanks for pointing that out…
Semper fi,
Jim
Tom Lewis, I to chose to walk point..mainly because I had to know what was going on..quite often would hear a firefight befor I was point..and by the time we got up there it would be over,,then have to wait till we set up our parimiter to ask what had happend,, when I was point I never had that problem..and as you said,, I knew I wax good at it..I hit only one boobytrap…felt it and was able to disarm it…spotted many of them..nobody was Kia or wia from boobytrap whilevi wax point..I take great pride in that,, has been a great read..I thank you for sharing this James
Special Marines and Army infantry guys could do the point
and really make the position ‘tap dance,’
but bad fortune could come along and change everything.
Some booby traps are impossible to discover by normal means
and that results in maiming and death…
even for the best scout-type of vet.
Thanks for writing about these special people, like you,
and how much guts it took to walk that point position…
knowing what I’ve written here when you walked it…
because you did it anyway.
Semper fi,
Jim
Very good read. 1st time to comment, but have been reading. Thanks for sharing Sr. Semper Fi.
Thanks David. I’m not sure I really try hard enough in measuring up to that compliment but
thank you for making it, and on here in public. Welcome to the site and thanks for being here…
Semper fi,
Jim
Brilliant writing , thanks again for reliving this for the world to be reminded of our great marines.
You are welcome Paul, although the writing of this actually was first done back in 1970 and then set aside for so many years.
It was written because I it was a bit of a catharsis for me and also because I was afraid I would forget over time. Neither was
true. So here it is, a more or less effective primer for those who might be entering the field of combat with no idea that the
training they’ve received will not keep them alive long enough to put it into practice….
Semper fi, and thank you,
Jim
Finally an opportunity to kick back on the enemy that has been tormenting the Marines all this time. As bad as the death of some Marines proved inevitable, the relief of at least winning once had be be an outstanding feeling not only for Jr., but everyone.
Riveting reading once again James.
Thanks for telling the story of the suck.
SEMPER Fi
Thanks Sgt Bob, thanks for the additional compliment on top of what you’ve written before. Yes, the story of the ‘suck.’ I’d forgotten
the use of that term.
Semper fi,
Jim
Oops! My mistake. should be Stevens” body.
Thanks Tom, for the editing help. You and the guys on here who correct the work are
so very important.
Semper fi,
Jim
You must be getting better. Only one error that I found. First paragraph (Stevens’ body).
Steven’s body. Great writing, I’ve been riveted to these chapters from the beginning.
That usage is acceptable but no preferred, at least somebody else told me!
Thanks for pointing out a difficult phrase I worked over badly.
Semper fi,
Jim
Fckn awesome sir….did your wife save any of the letters u sent home??? B cool to throw sum them in so we can see just how much spin u put on your “vacation” to the Nam… lol…I get the feeling u r going get ass chewwed for using kilo company as bait
My wife saved every one and the mail of the time delivered every one!
It is these letters, the old manuscript and some old maps that have been most helpful
in assembling the whole story. When the thirty days are done I will do as you suggest and publish the
letters so you guys can put that part of the puzzle all together too…
Semper fi,
Jim
Hampton. Here’s the sixteenth letter, a bit of it I just dug through and found:
“I have all my writing materials right here but it’s raining outside. I’m quite comfy
under my poncho here. Kinda like Hawaii with the windy misty rain stuff coming down
all the time. I’m writing next to the Song River that I can hear in the distance because
it’s in flood. It’s not as hard today as it was yesterday but I think I said that yesterday.
I hope everything is going okay there and maybe in a few days I’ll get something from you.
I have to go because the Gunny says there’s going to be some kind of personnel trouble
further down the valley. The valley’s a lot like that valley we saw in Arizona on the way
to Fort Sill but a whole lot wetter and filled with green shrubs and flowers.”
I am glad that you are giving us a view into the hell which went on in that war. May be some of the people will understand what you guys went through some how. thank you
god bless James Tarbet
Thanks James, when guys and gals come home from combat, real combat, my story might help
those back home understand what a load we carry in loss, grief and shock. And we are still kids
coming home. Thanks for the comment and the compliment in your words here…
Semper fi,
Jim
The segment was great and I look forward to more of them. Thank you
And you shall receive them Tim. I am writing the 16th Night third part
right now, or maybe I should really call it the Seventh Day because it’s dawn.
Sometimes I get confused a bit there so Chuck has to bring me back on first edit!
Thanks for the compliment and the comment about it here…
Semper fi,
Jim
Job well done Lt. I didn’t make it to the Nam but I served 72 to 75 3rd Armor/12th Cav in Germany and 5years in the Air Force 25 years reserves. My brother was an Army Company Commander in Nam 67 to 68. So all I can say is I would serve under you anytime.
Thanks Jones. I’ve met so many great men on this site. Just a few words and I know I would love to have served
with them…although my losses were so high that I also know I’d have lost a whole lot of them.
Thanks for being one of those guys and the high compliment written in public on here…
Semper fi,
Jim
Fckn awesome
Now that’s a Marine compliment if ever I read one! Thanks for that Marine…and I shall try to keep living up to it.
Semper fi,
Jim
The build up to this part of the story has been riveting James. I find, though, as soon as I start reading I begin to dread the end! Six months after my tour I was reassigned to Germany and took a pass to Paris to tour the Louvre where I happened to see this painting. It is, first of all, huge as I remember it it. Very unsettling as one feels they are looking at this through a window and not just oil on canvas. Definitely a perfect choice for this chapter.
Paris and Germany. Man oh man, that is to be admired. What wonderful places to get assigned.
And the painting. Yes, I saw it at the Louvre too and its size alone was intimidating, although I never
thought I’d use it to illustrate…and I didn’t. Chuck read the segment and then found the art online.
Amazing. He asked me if he should use it for the chapter and I was blown away. Of course. Life can be so strange…
Semper fi and thanks for that wonderful and well written comment.
Jim
BZ Lt BZ Finally we are getting some payback. Good tactics, do the unexpected. Good Plan Lt.
In retrospect none of it should have worked. The NVA should have had better communications as they had
to know we were on the move. The NVA should have had better flank and rear security out, as they seldom were caught
unawares. It was only a good plan because it worked. It shouldn’t have worked at all…but what the hell, the place was
a nightmare mess of disorganization and constant fuck ups….the ‘suck,’ as one guy reminded me a few comments ago.
The story of the suck.
Semper fi,
Jim
General Carl von Clausewitz called it “Nebel des Krieges” The Fog of War;
“That uncertainty in situational awareness experienced by participants in military operations, the uncertainty regarding one’s own capability, adversary capability, and adversary intent during an engagement, operation, or campaign.”
What we called it was Murphy’s Law….
1. Field experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
2. The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
3. Weather ain’t neutral.
4. Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
5. No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection.
6. No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
7. The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
8. No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
9. If it’s stupid but it works, it isn’t stupid.
10, Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.
“you were the exception”
I read all that and then reread three more times. I won’t change a thing.
You’ve been there to know all that. I really laughed at the ‘no combat unit has ever
passed inspection.’ Now that is funny. And what is it with God and weather.
Like humor weather with a touch of the macabre.
Thanks for this.
Semper fi,
Jim
a
I read this story and I feel like I’m hovering over this, seeing every thing you have written and while my favorite saying changes from time to time, I will say damn fine man I still shaking my head to myself and again I say; damn fine man.
Well Bill, an author and former commander in the Marines, cannot say anything but thank you for that short critique.
High compliment that I much appreciate…
Semper fi,
Jim
Is the Lt finally getting a decent amount of respect? You gave me a glimmer of hope with this. A good (?) outcome had to improve everyone’s spirits a little. And now we kick back, smoke em if we gottem and wait for the other shoe to drop. BTW, reading this and listening to that time’s music could make a fella cry if he wasn’t careful. Thanks for all of it, take a breath.
The Walt McKinley. Thanks for the analysis and the enjoyment you express about the segment. Yes, the old music when placed back
inside the scenes we experienced can definitely bring back deep emotion we could not express at the time.
Thanks for your usual stuff and impact…
Semper fi,
Jim
Walt beat me to the punch and took the words right out of my mouth especially about the music. Your comment too, Jim, about being played back inside the scenes we experienced made me smile……choked me up……..but left me with “warm fuzzies” of back in the day. Warm summer nights…..cruisin with your buds & babes
…….all the cool cars and GREAT tunes………man life was GOOD!
Coming home to that rock and roll we’d been introduced to in the bush, and more.
The cars that didn’t work worth a damn but man were they cool. Still cool today.
The young women who weren’t on iPads, iPhones or checking us out on the Internet.
Yes, it was something else to return to this phenomenal world after that stinking
reality…
Semper fi, and thank you for the comment, so well written…
Jim
Following and enjoying every chapter. Thank you for sharing here on Fb.
A-trp 4/12 cav. 68-69 LZ Nancy_ Quang Tri-A2- Rockpile-Dong HA.
It is my pleasure to lay all this stuff down on paper, finally, and again following that
first year out of the hospital, when I thought I better write it down or I’d forget it all.
Little did I know at the time. Forget this shit? Not fucking likely…
Semper fi,
Jim
Awesome. Can I breathe now?
Beat compliment Dan. Much appreciate the support it gives me and the smile…
Semper fi,
Jim
awesome, riveting and intimate. Outstanding Lt
Thanks RB for that laconic analysis and compliment. Typical Marine!
Semper fi,
Jim
always keeps me on the edge of my seat. chilling story
Thank you most sincerely, Don. Yes, it is and was the kind of story that makes believing kind of difficult
but when you internalize it you get the shivers if you’ve been back there in similar circumstance.
The battles and the combat was all different for all of us, and that cannot be denied either.
This is simply what happened to me…
Semper fi,
Jim
Intense to say the least. A stalk like that had to take a toll.
Yes, there was the piper to pay. If one would dance one must expect to pay the piper, kind of a thing.
Thanks for understanding and for writing about it on here…and the compliment, of course.
Semper fi,
Jim
The songs you choose are vivid to me LT.
Man, these songs were and remain so vivid to all of us. They and the aromas of the food and jungle
and mud and even the strange smell of
the water….
thanks for your comment and the compliment inherent in your words…
Semper fi,
Jim
If at all possible, can you show a map of where this is taking place. It helps with your description of the valley. Thanks.
It is a lot harder to scan and put up a map and then indicate where things are than you might think.
I have the maps of course and will consider doing that when I get a few moments. Thanks for the asking and I fully
understand your asking if you have never been down in that valley…
Semper fi,
Jim
Jim, IIRC you posted a link to a map of the A Shau some while back. I saved it, but I didn’t save it well enough to stand a computer crash.
In short, there’s no scan necessary, if you can find that link.
I shall endeavor to find that map again and put it up…
Semper fi,
Jim
http://www.33usmc.com/Maps/MapMain.html then find block number 6441-2 and click on the star. The Ashau runs more or less SE to NW right along the Laotian border.
Thanks Chet. The map helps a lot of guys. I am going to use a series of them when book II comes out.
Semper fi,
Jim
…to grip the butt of the Colt (than) have it dangling…
Best segment to date. Thanks
Hey, Floyd, thanks for that hefty compliment. I kind of smile when guys say that time after time. Am I getting better at
this, or what?
Semper fi,
Jim
Well Jim…another outstanding segment…and your plan worked just as Gunny knew it would…looks like he is starting to show a little respect for you…and your leadership skills…I can’t imagine having to let Kilo take the “initial fire” to allow the ambush to work…I know that is the way it had to be but that is some hard stuff to take when you are in command…once again excellent writing, as usual, and you are a master at putting us right there with you…the sights, the sounds, hell even the smells…and of course the music…I am on vacation in Daytona Beach and have told two guys I saw wearing Vietnam Vet hats about your book and one told me today it had looked you up…as usual…I anxiously await your next instalment…
Thanks Mark, for the compliment, and also the short story about the vets in Daytona Beach!
Neat stuff. Your time and writing the detail means everything…
Semper fi,
Jim
“Peine de morte,” Indeed! Good stuff.
Thanks Frank. I am most happy that some of this reaches an audience that can understand and ‘enjoy’ what is written.
Makes me keep on a goin’
Semper fi,
Jim
Finally the VC got a taste of their own making and it was good. More importantly, the company had success under their new temporary leader, building their moral. One suspects the officers of Kilo will pull rank on the second Lt., so leadership will fall into repute once again, as the companies come together. One also suspects that the VC will be back, to exact revenge in a major way.
You are prescient, I just know it. Sometimes I think you must possess some secret history of the company
nobody, including me, knows anything about. The next segment is not the neat rest and kick back chapter
most would believe it would have to be…
Semper fi, muy friend,
Jim
Having studied the Vietcong, one well knows how they react, particularly if they have been caught in their own trap. They took great pride in defeating the well armed allies. Such a humiliation as being caught with their pants down, requires revenge.
For some reason Kilo had direct support from the rear and seems to have avoided contact with the enemy and took the long way around to the base that was supposed to be established for the RVN. It is rather odd that they never came in time to give your company support until the present. Or were they supposed to be the mop up crew?
Irregardless, they are about to get plenty of action now. As one would bet that the next VC assault will be of battalion size. At least now you have more marines, air and field artillery support, to withstand another attack.
Your analysis. I love it. You have a talent and quite some life experience to be able to
come to such conclusions….And I’ll say no more just yet…
Semper fi,
Jim
I’ve been ok with the casualty rate up to now !! After taking thousands of cr’s , one becomes calloused to them !! The reality is when the records are delivered daily to the morgue & evac hospital at Thon San Nhut , Saigon !! There lies the wia & Kia who’s records one just wired on a few hours prior !! That makes it real & this segment hit hard !! Being ambushed along Hiway One quite often wasn’t exactly fun either !!! Carry on LT !!
Yes, there was no truth to the casualty reports back then and now, in today’s combat environment
they’ve done away with such reports entirely. Thanks for sharing your own experience here and the compliments, of course.
Semper fi,
Jim
Another gripping chapter! Well done sir!
Thanks Joseph. I am working at it and hopefully, the next few segments will be a little
more timely when it comes to maintaining the occurrences making up the plot of the structure.
Semper fi,
Jim
very good reading. do remember the night moves we did a lot of them. you couldn’t see anything and when it rained it was worse. you did good on that ambush you didn’t lose any men. now kilo needs to get down so you can get back to your co.
We tried to move at night as little as possible.
Part of the reason was the booby traps, which good point people
when you had them could discover many times in the day.
Never at night.
The night weather was also a problem because it was hard enough to move
through that shit in the day when it was raining.
Everything was so slippery…
and then there was the fear part and nights were hard for fear…
Semper fi,
Jim
Just great storytelling Jim! I’ve come to realize that reading about your experiences somehow validates my own memories. Not sure how, but I’ll take it.”I didn’t fight for this” near brought me to tears. Glad I found your writing on here. Semper Fi my friend!
Thanks, my view of the world does not always fit in with what the view
of a lot of veterans who’ve come home is.
I try not to do politics on here but I am sure a long way from wanting anyone
to fight unless it is a last gasp kind of thing that I have trouble not discussing that.
I hate carry conceal for citizens that have no clue and I don’t even much care for
the heavily armed police we’re streeting in this country.
We always seem to be treating the symptoms instead of the root causes
and violence only fixes the symptom…
if that, and nobody gets away with shooting somebody else to death without
carrying a load they in no way thought would ever be there.
And that I know.
Semper fi,
Jim
I do remember the dark over their we went on a bunch of night moves. i’m waiting for the doc. to call me back and i’m not a good waiter. any how that was a great chapter + you didn’t lose any men now killo needs to get their ass in gear and get down so you can make it back to your co. from what I have read they don’t want you to die you are their only hope off getting out alive.
Perspective is a funny thing, back here and in combat.
What do others think of what is going on and what you are
doing, or trying to do about it.
People all claim to not understand or not be good at talking
but when you look at results everyone pretty much has a vehement opinion to express
and they are anything but shy about expressing it.
Same in combat, except in combat stupid does get fixed.
By getting dead…usually with a lot of company.
Semper fi,
Jim
Another good one. Thanks!
You are most welcome Rick. Thanks for coming on here to say so.
Semper fi,
Jim
I love it when a plan comes together.
Thanks Sam, for reading intently and commenting on it here.
I’ll take that short piece to be a compliment…
Semper fi,
Jim
Payback is a bittch. Good job LT.
The night wasn’t over yet, not entirely. Read on…
And neither is mine. These are strange times to work through as the story progresses
and I won’t say it is taking a toll but I feel weird through some of it…like I’m really back there again.
This morning I woke up scared and I could not find a damn thing to be scared about.
I had to find my wife, daughter and Bentley…
and then things were alright again. Strange times, indeed.
That old fear in the middle of the chest that you hope is maybe
heart related, but you know it’s not!
Thanks for the nicely intentioned comment and the compliment…
Semper fi,
Jim
Mr. Strauss, This suggestion may not be on your radar, but when you finish the 30 days, will you consider comparing and commenting on what you have learned from your experience in Vietnam and compare it to our involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan. Should we commit our Patriotic Americans ever, to these Cluster F**<s. Is it just the Politicians helping to protect Big Business. I think however you clarify your ending, will defiantly help our current generation of Veterans. Thanks
I have no problem with laying out what I think about our entry into such conflicts.
I wrote my last paper for the CIA about it and I spoke to a defense industry audience in Hong Kong
of 3000 about it when I was leaving play.
The enormity of the mistake is only exceeded by the greed and evil nature of man driving and continuing it.
There is no way to ‘win’ such wars outside of genocide.
There is nothing to be done but endure the generations of hatred that spool out in huge waves
from the needless and hurtful killing violence.
The U.S. is, and has been for some time, so powerful militarily and economically
that there is no country on earth that cannot be surrounded and cut off from the rest of the world
until it wilts into either submission or oblivion.
There is no country on earth that can stand up agains our airpower, and there are really no other ‘true’ nuclear powers…
and I cannot elaborate on that without going into classified data to this day.
There you have it. Iraq, Afghanistan, and any other country we play these make believe war games with,
are actually advantaged and given money, meaning and status while future generations of Americans
are quietly and subtly handed their ass.
Semper fi,
Jim
Well stated Sir, in your response to Mr Pierce above. And I have met one young man who has decided the only answer right now is to go back to the mentality of the Europeans who stopped an enemy at location called Toledo I believe, and began killing until the enemy withdrew to the North African continent. He sees the problems that threw him into combat to be caused by the same migration of a culture which can never be reconciled to Western culture. His experience was as a very good rotary wing Army CWO, good in that he survived 30 yrs of Special Ops. My wish is to find him in line at Walgreens again and let him talk some more. Like you are speaking to us all here in your responses to the comments. Your replies this time reveal so much more than I expected to find out. An amazing human being taking us all on a trip we all need. Opening our brains to the real world of hurt. Thank you for this service. Poppa J
The process of ‘reconciliation’ you mention the young man as denying is actually called acculturation
in the discipline of anthropology, which you know defines itself as the study of man.
We can always come together and we can always survive together without killing one another
or we would not be here and running the planet. We built all this together not by killing one another.
It’s just much sexier to talk about the violence and I say this while writing a book about violence.
The Muslim religion, practiced in the majority of the 122 countries I visited while in the CIA were Muslim.
I was taken in by every Muslim group I encountered. I was given food and drink and personal trust
when they didn’t have a clue as to whom I was, nor did they care. I am a Christian.
I always felt I was among Christians and not something else when I was with them.
To see them become the evil devils resurrected from the Crusades is sad because its a PR stunt in my opinion to allow for this forever war.
It’s about money and people are dying over it…
but that’s not different than it was back in the crusades. It’s about competition.
It’s about genetic transfer of our genetic strain over theirs. And so on.
Thanks for letting me beat my anthropology drum for a bit.
Semper fi,
Jim
PS On the cross Jesus Christ is said to have said: “forgive them for they know not what they do.”
I don’t think he was talking about the crucifixion at all….
I agree wholeheartedly…Jim
Again, I find out more about one of the most interesting men I have never met. You are a thinker’s thinker who has taken the time to educate himself, but more so learn from the people God put in his company throughout this life. I bet we would be mesmerized by being able to watch a relaxed conversation between you and this man Chuck Bartok. I have save every bit of correspondence between us and this latest has broadened my thinking and will encourage me to do some more study in anthropology. As always thank you and this time helping me take my mind off of health issues. Just had a thought, I never have had a disappointing meeting with a Marine or former. Don’t know what it is exactly, but I am drawn to learn more about them. Dang good Sunday, good conversation and celebrating 57 years with my sweetie today. S. Fi. Poppa
Chuck Bartok is a brilliant man and our discussions go all the way back to a Jaycee hall in
San Clemente, California where Chuck was sort of running things and I was trying to fit back into
this phenomenal world after the Nam. He was as much of a help back
then in 1970 as he is to me today.
And we disagree about a lot, but it is a learning disagreement….
not that we admit that to one another very often.
Thanks for the generous criticism of some of what I write in response
to comments because I do take chances in laying out beliefs.
Most writers do not want to lose any readers because of expressed beliefs outside of the literary
context of their work. I care but don’t care, if that makes any sense.
I am just me these days and very much a product of those days.
Thanks for the wonderful comment Poppa.
Semper fi,
my friend,
Jim
The shock of battle …………… The screams – cries – whimpers – The noise of destruction ………. Now to finish what has been wrought of steel — fire — flesh — blood — At the cost to your soul………….
Yes, This Magic Moment ………. From Hell.
Semper Fi/This We Defend Bob
Not many words in that comment Robert….but a whole lot of meaning.
Thanks, as usual.
Semper fi,
Jim
Incredible! Glad to see that you were able to take the fight to the NVA. You definitely made the right call with saving Kilo. After all the stress and uncertainty I can only imagine the range of emotions at the end of that.
I did some things of integrity as a Marine that were simply automatic
and yet sometimes motivate by the fear that if my men did not like me or find me valuable
that I would be very quickly dead.
With that kind of rolling fear it was very difficult to judge what was right or wrong or both at the same time…
Semper fi,
Jim
Doesn’t matter what side you’re on or which branch or outfit, I guess dieing in war feels as bad as it gets.
Unless just about dieing sounds worse.
The dying part on the field is usually quick, and as you point out,
it’s usually the living that’s damned painful.
The wounded that go out, when you can get them out.
The wounded that cruelly die because medivac can’t make it in.
And the pain of the living who are not hit physically but are so devastatingly hit psychologically.
My torso scars are invisible to general public, even at the beach where I wear a “T” shirt all the time.
But my psychological damage can only be disguised and not hidden completely.
The pain of writing this is there but its buffered by how good I feel that
some of the stories within the story are getting told.
There were some great men I lived and died with..
Semper fi,
Jim
LT, just when I think that you can’t reach any further down in to my gut and wrench it anymore than you already have, you do. They are your Marines now. Semper Fi Sir.
Thanks Mike. It’s all there and out it comes, not easily and not in one sitting.
I am trying not to control the roll out but to simply let the events unfold with what
I can recall of the sights, smells and the miserable interactions of fauna and flora…
and the Marines and enemy of course….thanks for the comment.
Semper fi,
Jim
My emotions are surging in several directions at once. I can only marvel at what yours were at the time. Another great segment Lt. Airborne!!
The emotions in the situation are different. Sort of colder but deeper in their coldness and the hurt is
not this crying surface or demonstrable thing. It’s way down inside. I can’t really describe it. I want to
emote more today, and do, over some of this stuff than I did back then. How did I hold it all inside and then
come home and not be able to let it out either. To this day it is terribly hard. To sit again and stare at the bodies
of the guys laying there at the bottom of that wall. Yes, they’ve been there all along but I truly am able to never think
about them. I put other junk in the way if my mind slips in that direction. The last lines of this last segment were truly some
of the most difficult I have gotten down on paper and then I just had to send it to Chuck unedited and go do something.
Anyway.
Thanks for the comment and the care in your comment…
Semper fi,
Jim
Deadly three dimensional chess played with the enemy and within the unit. And in a torturous way, within each soldier.
LT, Thanks for the new chapter. As always, it was worth the wait. You write wonderfully in sharing this compelling story.
When teaching the adult Sunday School class, I referenced you and your book–as it fit in perfectly with a part of the lesson. (Bet you never thought you and your book would be part of a Methodist Sunday School class.) One guy spoke to me later and wanted to order the book. I filed him in…
Wow! You are correct there in your conclusion Walter. A Sunday School Class. Wow. I have to be more careful with my language (note that in the book
I am careful because over there the “F” word was used all over the place and at all times. Thanks for this vote of support and for the book and story being
on your mind.
Semper fi,
Jim
Jim, I of course omit any use of foul language…but I was sure to tell them that is is absolutely one of the best books I have ever read. The reference in the class I taught was about answering a question as to who are the captive audiences who would be receptive to the Word of God. I related how one of the posters here bought and gave give of your books to a local prison and how the inmates were devouring the books…and how we might serve the hunger of captive audience inmates in our community for worthwhile reading.
May God bless you in your writing endeavor and help rid you (and others) of those ghosts of war that veterans wrestle with and bedevil you and them.
Heartfelt thank you for your service, and for your captivating writing saying what needs to be said.
Thank you Walter. It is so interesting to see where your mind explores
the human condition and conditions under which men and women can find themselves where
they really do pay attention and internalize stuff.
The wild reactionary life we all lead is so reaction oriented.
Thanks for your thoughts and for sharing the material of my writing…
Semper fi,
Jim
I think you have already earned the respect of the non-coms and the gunny, Lt. I can’t flaw your kwik ability to adjust your tactics and to come up with these plans. You are truly a leader.
Relativity. The plans were invented in order to win over the Marines and
also because some things were simply logical but logic is in short availability in a combat
arena. The Gunny openly and secretly backing my plays was everything although I did not fully understand that
at the time. The guys wanted to live and I had an active mind they came to want to use.
Thanks for the compliment. I wish I’d felt more like a leader at the time…
Semper fi,
Jim
Great chapter, Jim. Thank you. I didn’t spot any typos. Looks like Bentley is doing a fine job!
Thanks Tim. Yes, baby Bentley is doing fine and performing the service he was meant to perform, no doubt heavily influenced by
Harvey and maybe some of the guys Harvey seemed linked back to.
Thanks for the comment and for saying something about Bentley…
Semper fi,
Jim
Thank you for another great chapter. Steady pace wins the race.
I sure am glad your Marines and your Scouts took care of you.
Dave, sometimes it worked and sometimes it did not, the plans, the guys, the supporting services…
what a terrible mess it all was now in memory. Back then it simply was.
Thanks for the comment…
Semper fi,
Jim
Fighting for Survival and win is hard in the Bush!
Sometimes winning did not feel like it but you were winning if you survived to go another day.
Great chapter!
Chris Culifer
Thanks Chris, and yes, the winning part which was living. There was none of the other winning because it just
went on and on and on without audience to cheer or approve. The daily and after action reports just disappeared to be lost
forever. Medals appeared later out of the either, with their jumbled descriptions of things that never happened.
Did any of it really happen or was that one of those previous lives kind of thing?
Semper fi, and thank you for the depth of that…
Jim
Morning James, Yes Medals, Bright Ribbons …….. Luke you, I don’t remember why I received them, No way to attach them to specific acts, So many time I was just doing what I saw my job to be, To get it to the Grunts, to get the Grunts to the objective, and to Get Them Home after…………. Wake up 0 dark 30, Shower, Shave, shit, Mess Hall, Then flight ops for the screw job of the day, Pre Flight, and off into the unknown, 47 little V attached to those ribbons ……. Until a very short while ago, I didn’t understand those little V’s An Air Force Colonel, Korea Vet, Flew F-86’s explained to me, That those little V’s were marking the times I was on the very edge of dying ….. And all I was worried about was getting it to the Grunts and Getting them out alive, or back home to their Mothers and fathers and Family fir a last good by…….
Semper fi/This We Defend As Always a Brother Welcome Home Bob.
Robert. You are so right on, as usual.
The thoughts of real combat men and women, living it out in the bush,
is far from what mythology portrays or that people in the rear or even back home understand.
Yes, there are those that come out to the bush for decorations or career advancement.
They die in droves or quickly change every bit of orientation they came out to the field with.
Thanks for your usual accurate and thoughtful comments…
Semper fi,
Jim
I was not there until now.
And I still feel guilty .
John,an old M.D.
You are there now and you should feel no guilt doc. You are an outstanding man whom
I would have been proud to serve with in the company….and today your’d be as dead as a doornail, so I’m tickled that
you missed that show. You are a delight now and your service back then was pretty damned exemplary too…
Semper fi,
Jim
Wow. That is so intense, I can feel every flinch and heart rending for the Marines of Kilo and yet the subtle pride of saving the rest. Good writing. On a side note LT, I’m going in for open heart surgery on the 22nd. Hope to be back by the next installment, but if not I wanted to thank you again for sharing your story. Semper Fidelis.
SSgt. I would appreciate knowing more detail about where you will be and when this will be over.
You have become an important person here and with me. Thanks for all your comments and I like to think they are simply going to cut some of
your heart out because currently it is too big! Semper fi, and God bless you my friend,
Jim